Yesterday I tried to give Reiko a sedative to facilitate a quick clean up and to put on her harness.
I failed.
It turns out that Mauzers have incredibly sensitive noses when it comes to detecting medicine slipped into their Cesar Filet Mignon-adjacent portion. She simply refused to eat her breakfast, and normally she loves filet mignon for breakfast as would we all, except Lois and Monika who are strange vegetable-only eaters.
Seriously, Reiko was acting like Catherine DeMedici’s grumpy neighbor facing a bowl of chili at a block party. Very dramatic.
The food sat all day, untouched, until I gave up and replaced it with an unmedicated dish of the same food, whereupon she gobbled it up like she had been starving all day, which was true.
So we started again this morning. I decided to be crafty.
Yesterday I simply put the chopped pill parts in the filet mignon-adjacent dog food and covered it up.
Today, sly me ground up the trazadone into medical dust and laced it into Reiko’s prime rib-adjacent breakfast. She ran to the bowl licking her chops and then promptly did a 180 degree turn and went back to hiding under the dining table.
“Traitor!” I could almost hear her say, “Stop trying to kill me!|
Now before anybody chimes in with inexpensive advice, hear this: I know all about pill pockets and have tried them; they are a useless product. I have tried sneaking pills into high value lunch meat treats. I have tried the old swap-a-rooney of offering one snack and swiftly substituting a medicated one. I even have a dog pill injector that fires a pill into the back of a dog’s throat – I swear that’s true.
None of these will work here. Remember this Mauzer cannot be caught or touched. Trust me, the ways of the ancients have no place here.
But if you have a novel idea, I’m all ears. I’ll just be over here painting The Creation of Adam on the ceiling of my garage.
Love to hear from ya