Reiko is not much into astronomy. I guess that’s why she was surprised when, after a hurried jaunt to the Camellia bush, I told her “Yo, girl, you got some major Klingons circling Uranus.”
Come on, you know exactly what I mean.
There, wasn’t that done delicately, huh?
Thing is, it was a situation that could not be ignored. At the same time, I could not face a repeat of the utter chaos that defined the clean up after the Poopocalypse.
(Notice how time in this household is divided into before and after the Poopocalypse?)
Anyway, after due pondering I came with a new plan.
Key elements:
- Drag Miss Reiko into the small bathroom and close the door
- Detach harness and leash
- Fill the tub with nice warm water and doggy bath soap
- Spend quality time together and bond before bathing (hahahahaha)
- Dunk the dog and scrub, scrub, scrub
- Rinse, pat dry and reassemble with collar only; harness to be added when dog is dry
- Provide treat
- Absorb hate
It actually worked very well. After a few minutes of terror when she was first dragged into the bathroom (plus one pee on the floor in fear) she settled down reasonably well.
I think the confined space was a better venue than the kitchen sink where escape was a definite possibility.
The bathing part was not – mirabile dictu! – a big deal. She tried to escape from time to time but there was no biting or death spirals. The welding gloves were not needed.
She had a great scrub and a nice spray rinse.
To dry her, I wrapped a towel around her, picked her up on to my lap as I sat on the toilet seat and rubbed her with a warm, fluffy towel.
She seemed to actually seemed to be enjoying the drying massage. So I snuck in a lot of pats and scritches and gave her my first full doggie hug.
She seemed to accept the hug – my first cuddle! I was so happy. Admittedly, it was under duress to a degree but I’ll take my Mauzer hugs where I can get them.
She’s now sitting on the love seat, clean and mean.
I boldly traveled where no man has gone before. It’s a brave new world!
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