Up until now, Reiko has shown no interest in bacon. For a dog, that’s heresy of high order.
I don’t trust men who wear a lot of cologne or jewelry, women who are intensely jealous or dogs that distain bacon.
Call me old fashioned. Or call me a martini, I don’t care.
This morning after gym, I looked in the refrigerator and discovered a few eggs that were almost old enough to cluck for their Mama and a rasher of Costco bacon of equal provenance.
I thought to myself, “Self, what about the starving children in China?” “You can’t let this go to waste.”
That phrase immediately marked me as a Boomer but so what.
Anyway, as I sat down to my repast, I spotted the Mauzer skipping out the patio door and relieving herself by the Camelia bush which is perfect doggie behavior.
I thought maybe a sliver of bacon would be a good reward, at least worth a try. So when she returned, I made the little clapping hands sign that means “Good Girl!” and then offered her a piece of the pork.
She approached tentatively, slowly extending her neck until her little doggie lips could snare the meat.
Well…you wouldn’t believe the reaction. It was like she had just tasted the Nectar of the Gods, Heavenly Ambrosia, Manna and the fruit from the Fruit of the Loom cornucopia all rolled up in one!
And yes, I know that cornucopia is allegedly a Mandela moment. (Look it up.)
Guess which DogDad had a hero moment? So I pushed a little further and tried to leverage the bacon treat into a small scratch under the chin.
Absolutely not. Zoomed away as always. Bacon – oh yes. Touch – oh no. Yoko Ono.
But at least Reiko has taken one more step towards normality. I just hope the bacon doesn’t occasion another Poopocalypse.
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